On July 16 around 3 pm, my cherry was popped. No, not that one; I’m still holding out. The popped cherry was me FINALLY attending one of Monica Wilson’s Xoticy classes. Well…more like 3 back to back classes.

I was first introduced to Xoticy in early 2015 through an Instagram post by Jessica of J’Samone’s Stiletto Dance Experience. Of course I had to go check out the Xoticy IG page…followed by the YouTube channel. I can’t tell you which video made me want to try it out, but as a woman who likes being barefoot equally as she likes her high heels, I was down.

Fast forward to July 2016, I’d been on the fence about attending because I was supposed to leave for a work trip the Sunday after, but once my trip was pushed back, I registered and decided to go big or go home by signing up for all three classes. Even though I’ve been in and out of heels dance classes over the past year, I was nervous. You’d think I’d be less nervous as I’m barefoot with or without socks when I’m not at work, but I had butterflies. Although I’d mentioned the class, I didn’t invite my girls to come along because I felt it was something I needed to experience at least once by myself so that I could see behind the insecurities and get in my sexy.

Monica broke the ice at the start of class. I thought she was taller than she actually is, but because her hair is the definition of hair growth goals and her personality is larger than life – full of truth, realness, and a passion for empowering women to do sexy their way – you really couldn’t tell…unless you asked to take a photo with her and stood 6 feet tall.

Each class had different choreography with the first two classes being completely new dances. In class one, I was still kind of shy and nervous about really putting all my personality into it. By class two and three, I couldn’t care less because I was there for me. It wasn’t about learning moves I could do to dance for a guy. It wasn’t an experience I signed up for just to talk about it on social media. It was about me continuing the journey of discovering and defining my sexy. It’s easy to get caught up in the game of what do you need to change about yourself to be sexy – lose weight, straighten your kinky and coily hair, keep your face beat – but if you’re doing it to get someone’s attention – your motives are wrong. Throughout the classes, Monica would consistently remind us to throw out what we think is sexy, forget about the inner Beyonce and just do you. That was needed and appreciated. My alter ego Ari Bamboo had the time of her life Saturday and I recommend other women check out her tour or classes in Atlanta if you’re interested.